Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Strength

I have the strength, with God at the helm, to jump companies today, and earn more while learning about different topics as I conduct further research.  This is the coolest way to not only hone my skills, but gain education at the same time.  I learned today, that my field of work in a survey format is totally rocking.  In addition, doing surveys for the music industry are the highest paid options to date.  It's fun when I can put on my headphones, and go for it.  Honestly, there is no batter way to earn while learning more about different styles of music, and writing my reviews at the same time.

My best friend graduated with me from UH Main and our fields are linked.  She is in Maketing, and I in Market Research.  I wish my degree reflected this.  In a way, it kind of has.  I was able to use marketing skills while teaching, to put myself out there, and gain students.  I began teaching while in high school, and continued working in college and away from campus.  Granted, back then, it was volunteer work, but this counts on my resume too, should I revisit the field again.  I tutored privately, and while living in Spring, I juggled a tutoring job with educational retail.  Both of my bosses are still working quite hard as educational professionals, and I am proud to have them in my work profiles.

Today, everything is online.  However, I can still communicate with clients and colleagues in market research company chat forums.  Working from home allows me to have flexibility in family time and time with friends.  The companies know me well, and they know this is the best way to get things done, and take time off if I need to.  Remoting in is easy.  And if I am away, I can easily access my accounts, and take care of business.  When Mom died, I took bereavement leave, and had co workers that gave me the best support I could ask for.

Today I am still growing.  And I love the fact that in times of hardship, I learn more than the average person.  The toughest part of my job is being patient when my server is slow, or my connection drops while working.  Doing a reboot may mean the loss of an assignment, but these things happen.

I stay strong, and keep moving forward.

Monday, January 30, 2017

Joy Means Dance!

I have the afternoon off.  I now have time to coreograph a new routine for my YouTube channel.  Even though The Go Go's retired, Belinda Carlisle has more songs for me to choose from.  I also plan on adding Bruce Springsteen to my list, along with Adele.  Sting is in progress this week.

Sunday, January 29, 2017

Truth

I have made a new discovery regarding Christine's sermon about truth.  I am in my early 40s now, and I am quickly learning that truth isn't always negative brutal honesty, pointing out my flaws.  Truth, in short, can also be a positive coin toss.  I am saying this because even though I wasn't in church this morning, she still gave me something to meditate on.  I am a writer.  I see her writing sermons in my head.  For it is this skill that we both share.  And it's within this skill, that we discover truths, whether they are orally shared, or the way of the Lord, from the Bible.

Truth for me today was about cheering my niece on during her second volleyball game.  Her team won 2 of 3 games.  She, like me, never gives up, or quits, even when losing.  Truth:  we both know it's hurtful when we lose, but at the same time, the truth is, we can grow from our losses.

Dad and I had tuna for lunch.  God told us that as we prepared the meal, that the sea would part for us to get our tuna.  Ha ha.  I am so excited about this weekend.  I did more work, and earned more in the process of growing while staying focused.  The sub companies have me wrapped around their finger. The last two days, I completed 2 90 minute surveys.  One was worth $10 for my travel expenses, and the newest one is worth $40.  The key is the length of the survey, and the commitment.  The topic is always the same.  Music.  No joke.  To my musically inclined and music career friends, I salute you!

What A Feeling!  This song is playing while I have down time.  As a dancer, I am always seeking new songs to choreograph.  At the same time, truth comes into play when God says it's okay to try new songs that my niece likes.  From Uptown Funk to Shut Up And Dance With Me, I am truthfully loving these hits.  The coolest part of dance is when I can do burpees and throw in yoga and PT moves.

One might think that it's crazy, but dance is less dangerous for me, and I can take my time.  I also truthfully discovered that walking is painful physically.  Dance, however, releases my pain.  It's also not progressive, so things can improve.

Medical truth:  I couldn't have SDR surgery as a girl, due to the fact that it is performed out of state.  My "twin" had it done because her parents were able to fly her to Denver, and rent a townhouse in Houston for her recovery.  She is now celebrating her 37th birthday March 26th.  I am November 26th.  I was born in 1975, and she in 1980.  If anyone can dance and appreciate music the way we do, we have accomplished our goal of educating others.  It's ongoing.

My Baclofen pump was implanted in 2006, and my second one March 3, 2013.  I have three years of device life before a replacement is due.  Like Selective Dorsal Ryzotomy, my Baclofen pump is also spinal surgery.  Google both if you want to learn more.

Aggieland is her hometown, born and raised, so I send out a Gig'Em and Whoop for her often.  Autism is on the front burner right now in America and worldwide.  It means my twin and I can relax with Spastic Diplegic Cerebral Palsy, because we aren't in the spotlight.  It means we can teach others, and not be on Facebook doing it.  In fact, she is offline, which meant I could send her a hand written letter in cursive, last year.  She got it.  Truth:  I can put the electronics down.  Most of you can't.  We prefer letters and visits.  See ya Facebook.

I am simply there to get updates from family.  They coerced me into getting an account.  It was not my choice.  Case closed.  I would rather live via my blogs, e-mails, and tweets because my Germany friends keep up with me this way.  Put down the tech.  Look into my eyes.  Look into the eyes of my twin.  We know life better than most of you.  Pick up a pen, paper, and phone.  Make an effort.  I have flown to Kansas and California to see friends back to back, two years in a row.  Excuse us, but if we can do it, so can you.  My twin helps me take a stand, and we march on our own.

You should try it.  It's exhilarating.  This, in closing, is a true challenge.

Saturday, January 28, 2017

Rockin' Out!

Live on iHeart Radio, all 80s Party.  Not only do I remember these songs, but they are great to dance to, as I self coreograph more routines.  Can this be a sign of more moving, and keeping my body healthy?  Abso-freakin' loutely!  I lost 7 pounds, and my test results will be reviewed in February 2017.

Everything is outpatient, so I can come home to dance it out, according to Grey's Anatomy.

Tomorrow, my niece has 3 volleyball games, so we are going to pick one.  She is now doing professional volleyball, so we are proud.

I'll be working tomorrow to get ahead.  Then, Monday will be another day of relaxation.  We have an on site massage therapist, so I plan to book an appointment quickly.  Having done massage and PT in college, it's time to revisit both.  My disability causes pain, and massage is one way to do pain control.  It should be fabulous.

I did some shopping this weekend, and feel good about it.  Paleo approved foods, and a new pair of shoes.  I can hit the dance floor harder than ever now.  If I can lose 3 more pounds, I'll be comfortable.  My Baclofen Pump will also stabilize internally.

February will be busy, but I'll try to post at least one entry daily.  Until tomorrow....

Friday, January 27, 2017

New Work Projects

Tonight has been amazing!  My market research team has branched me out to sub companies.  I not only get higher earnings, but each specialty survey is 90 minutes.  The topic?  Music.  My best friend is a musician, and I sent her a note from across the pond.  I am celebrating with Celine Dion on my TV via my Bluray player.  Mom is cheering me on.  French was our language, and Celine was the artist we bonded with.  Shout out to Quebec pals!  Canada is special because they have a dialect all their own.

Because You Loved Me, I can go on Mom.  I love you too.  J'ai beaucoup de courage pour parle notre langue d'amour.  Je t'aime toujours maman.

Baptism Day

Rev. Lauren Greene is baptizing Nathan, Noah, and Marcelle today.  Erin and Brandon are the godparents, and they are stoked.  The parents are actually single moms, which makes this time very special.  Diana, Marcelle's mom, and Sandra, Nathan and Noah's mom, are all set for the Christining.

Parents and Godparents, name these children.  Victoria Marcelle, Noah Blair, and Nathan James.  Parents, Godparents, and congregation, rather than use the Book of Common Prayer, you may follow along in the leaflets.  Lauren is a cancer survivor, and her vision changed after chemo in 1992.

Do you promise to love and support these children as they grow with God in Christ?

We will with God's help.

Do you renounce Satan and all of the spiritual forces of wickedness that rebel against God?

I renounce them.

Members of the congregation, do you promise to serve as witnesses and counselors to these children as they grow with Christ in this parish?

We will with God's help.

Please stand as we renew our own baptismal covenant.

I believe in God the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth who has blessed me with the Son of God in Christ.

Please present the first child.  Diana steps forward.  I present, Victoria Marcelle for the Sacrement of Baptism.  Lauren continues.  Victoria Marcelle, I baptize you in the Name of the Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit.  Victoria Marcelle, you are sealed by the Holy Spirit, and marked as Christ's own, forever.

Please present the next children.  Sandra steps forward.  I present, Noah Blair and Nathan James, for the Sacrement of Holy Baptism.

Nathan James and Noah Blair, I baptize you in the name of the Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit. Nathan James and Noah Blair, you are sealed by the Holy Spirit, and marked as Christ's own, forever.

The baptismal candles are lit, and handed to the families.  Let us welcome the newly baptized.

We recive you into the household of God, Confess the Faith of Christ Crucified, and welcome you into His Holy Kingdom.  Amen.

The Peace of the Lord be always with you.

And also with you.

Although this is paraphrased, it's proof that I pay attention in church.  What a special day.

Thursday, January 26, 2017

Recent Growth

Now that you've read some posts about me and my mom, here's another that I am happy about.  School years were very difficult, and I didn't have loyal friends until college.  UH Main was the best 7 years of my life.  Despite not having all accommodations in place, I proudly held my head up, and attacked my classes with gusto.  I started out in Psychology, moved to French, Spanish, and Philosophy.  Then, in 2002, I walked, feeling even more euphoric.  Even though we dealt with 2 suicides before graduation, all of my fellow Cougars came together to support their families, and we comforted each other.  One was an acting student, and the other had autism.  It was tragic because they were due to walk with us.  I struggled in 2004 while moving on in my life, but that quickly subsided when we made our move to Spring.  Ten years later, we are back in Fort Bend County, attending The Episcopal Church Of The Epiphany.

While in Spring, I managed to work 2 jobs, and go back to school for a year, studying medical science and coding.  The school specialized in medical sciences, and I proved everyone wrong again. Ha ha!  My knowledge I now have has carried over to my daily life.  Eat your heart out ICD 10!  Booyah!

Today, I am working in the Market Research field, and it fits me like a glove.  I do everything from online surveys to home based studies for upcoming products, and consulting with other clients.  Not only am I growing at work and with my family, but I am also growing at Epiphany.  In my lifetime, I never thought I'd see a clergy change as significant as this current one.  I am still getting to know Christine and Lisa, and having Joseph as music director is also a blessing.

I am humbled and excited.  Not only do we welcome Joseph and Tracy as a gay couple, but welcoming Christine and Lisa as female rectors as well helps me feel like I belong.  I came out in 1997, and Mom was with me.  And being a woman with male clergy was not bad, but I always felt misunderstood.  Today, all of that has changed.  Even though I have challenges that are not always glorious, God continues to help me grow, while being a lesbian woman in modern society today.

Christine blessed me when I turned 41, but she said, "May Susana learn new things."  I still am.  Growth abounds.  Lisa also prays for me, and this is very helpful.  The spiritual adventures continue.

Article From 1981

When I was six years old, Mom and I flew to DC before a congressional committee for a hearing regarding the hospital care and adoption of special needs children.  One little boy with Down's didn't survive, prompting the hearing.  The hospitals failed to help him due to lack of funding and the idea that special needs children cannot live well with disabilities.  I kept the articles that my aunt laminated, and it was tragic to be young and hear not only this case, but another, in which the mother abused her son.  I was across the table from another Dallas boy, who also had Down's, and the two of us became fast acquaintances.  My mom spoke out, with bravery, courage, and honesty.  "If you can't make a solid commitment to adopt and raise a special needs child, simply, don't do it." In the article, due to the privacy act, we were protected.

My adoption was closed, and my neonatologist said, "I can help this little baby."  My mom not only fostered me, but later said, "I want to keep her."  From that point, mom drove me to specialists, therapists, PT and OT, countless hospital stays, and more.  I lost this beautiful woman in 2016 to Altzheimer's Disease, a battle she fought for 8 years.  The role reversal was one of pure love.  I bravely stepped up.

She was my world.  Today, she's proud of me.  I kept all of our mother/daughter advice in my letter box, and brain.  CP patients have a keen ability to remember more details than those without it.  I am one of them.  It's a far cry from 1981, but I can honestly say, it was so worth it.  My thoughts now are whether or not the senators from the hearing are still alive.  A small number of people I knew, including doctors, have passed, but I am still around.  My team didn't give up, and neither did I.

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Dissociation Christmas Baby Update

Little Marcy is finally home!  For the record, she is named after my dental hygienist.  Or, shall we say, semi-retired, in Aggieland.  Whoop!  Love you Marcelle!

The boys are still in the NICU.  What a road to be traveled.  Kristie and Erica, at Memorial Hermann, The Woodlands, I suited up to head to the NICU and see the babies.  What a humbling time that was.

Reality can hit me in all directions.  Dissociative Identity Disorder is nothing to sneeze at.  I have been embracing my mental illness for years, and celebrate my milestones.  Today, there are 40 of them.  And my Baylor MD knows the story of Sybil, so she has a keen medical insight, since my case is rare.  Cerebral Palsy caused medical trauma, and thus, the splitting.  My first split happened in 1979, and my final split happened in 2010.  The Posse is 14 women, 4 men, and 2 little girls.  The other 20, Class Act, are 10 Russian students, and 10 Japanese students.

The homecoming of little Marcy is just another chapter.  Abbi and Melissa are doctors.  They specialize in gynecology, and complex births.  The boys are being cared for by Connie, Steven, and Tess.

The downside to this disorder happens when I get told that it's my imagination.  I wouldn't be on medications or seeing a psychiatrist if this were indeed imaginary.  That's just as ignorant as someone telling a depressed patient to smile.  My two key medications are Prozac and Zyprexa.  My new normal came when I got a Baclofen Pump implant in 2006.  We finally have my Cerebral Palsy, CP, and DID under control.  The key, simply put, is, I am not ashamed.  Education is key.  Having suffered from depression and more in the process of being where I am is also important.

On the outside, I am put together, and very articulate.  I work from home now.  My colleagues get it.  Agoraphobia is sometimes something I value.  I can't hold a job because of my CP.  It's considered a work away from home liability since I only qualify for part time work, and would have zero insurance coverage.  It's why previous jobs were a year or less.  I was still paid, and a volunteer, but the risks were simply too great.  Working from home means I can set my own hours, earn what I can, and live independently while under my dad's roof.

With the babies where they are, I can still live a full, rich life while watching them grow in their incubator.  This is not a misprint.  They need each other's touch and mine, to survive and thrive.

Upon release from the hospital, all 3 babies will be baptized into the Episcopal Church.  Marcy is awaiting her new friends' homecoming.

These Dreams, by Heart, is playing right now.  Joy!  Music has saved me from a lot of medical complications, all outpatient.  ER cures my headaches.  When Melissa and I wed, we knew we had something special.  She started out her medical career as an ER physicician, and 2 years ago, in 2014, she became Chief of Surgery at Mansion Medical Hospital.  I work in the family wing, helping families cope with surgery times when loved ones are in the ER and OR.  Abbi is an ER EMT.  She not only transports patients, but she stays in the ER to treat them prior to sending them to the OR.

Going back to school has paid off for me.  Medical coding and courses can be done by disabled populations, much like our counterparts.  Sometimes, we exceed expectations, and end up doing more than they do.  This is a time when I can honestly take a stand to tell you I am able, and proved it.

The twins are just the beginning.  More to come...